Six (or seven) essential tips for Israel tour guiding this summer

17 Jun

As we enter the peak of the guiding season and consider our educational goals for the summer, licensed guide and Teaching Israel director Ilan Bloch takes a (somewhat) tongue-in-cheek look at this summer’s real goals…

Image courtesy of Wikipedia

Image courtesy of Wikipedia

The six (or 7) ש’s/Sh’s

a) שתייה/Shtiya/Drinking – Without water and stops to refill or buy more water, your summer has ended before it starts. The blank look on the face of the chanich staring past you isn’t just because he doesn’t care about the Second Temple period; it’s because he’s also suffering from dehydration.

b) Shade/צל/Tzel– Even if you can literally make King David come alive and speak to the group, if it’s not happening in the shade, it’s not worth it. However much chanichim may love to sunbathe at the beach, for some reason they don’t want to do so while listening to even King David himself speak with them.

c) ש”ח/New Israel Shekel – Ensure that your group has access to ATMs and change places, otherwise d), e) and f) can’t happen.

d) שווארמה/Shawarma– Along with the delicious and nutritious packed lunches from the hostel, make sure your group has the opportunity to buy fast food during break times, otherwise you might see them suffering from schnitzel (or, worse yet, Tivol corn schnitzel) overdose.

e) Shopping/shoes – The northern border might heat up, but in terms of interest, such an event might pale in comparison to hot summer sales — especially relevant to the Naot factory outlet.

f) שירותים/restrooms – When they really need to go, they really, really need to go. Anticipate restroom stops before emergency situations develop. And, no matter what the bus driver says, two stops on “long-haul” journeys (e.g. Safed to Jerusalem) are an absolute necessity.

And, if they are not a youth group, then

g) שתוי/Shatui/Tipsy – As opposed to שיכור/Shikor/Drunk, which is not allowed. Without their opportunity (legally, for the 18-20 y.o., in this country, as opposed to in the US) to imbibe (according to the rules), some chanichim may feel they were robbed of a transformative experience in the Land of Goldstar and Arak.

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